With the news of robin Williams’ death (a suicide), I’m reminded of my own struggles and of how close I have come to taking my own life.. it saddens me greatly to think of another person being tormented so much that the only option they could see as viable was to end it all.. I’ve been down in the depths, in the darkness, alone; I’ve been so full of despair that I no longer wanted to live.. it’s frightening to be in that place, to not care anymore.. I can’t think about it anymore, it’s pulling me down right this very moment.. but the point was to say that I can understand where he was coming from, to fear that you make no impact on the world around you.. or worse yet, that you have only negative influences on the people you care about.. it’s nigh onto impossible to be pulled from that place, to come up out of those depths, and to continue to live.. I hope that those who struggle with mental illness, especially suicidal thoughts, have someone they can talk to.. I hope that people are able to get treatment and can begin to thrive.. we all need to someone to care about us, to love us.. can you be that someone?
I’m glad that you are still here and hope that you know that your life does have purpose. Sometimes that can be so hard to accept when we can’t see our immediate usefulness or impact that we have- especially to those around us. It isn’t always for us to see though and may be farther reaching than our field of vision. Take heart, you are still here, living this life, drawing every breath for a reason. I challenge you to stay active with your blog. 🙂
I will do my best to stay consistent with this whole blogging thing..
I appreciate your insight; it’s difficult sometimes to realize that you aren’t a burden to your family and that they wouldn’t be happier or better off with you gone.. when in the darkness, it’s hard to see what might should be obvious.. that’s why it’s imperative that family and friends are vigilant to keep watch over those prone to bouts with mental illness..